Prologue (excerpt)Page 1May 14, 1970 should have been the greatest day of Bob Kerrey's life. At precisely 11 o'clock that morning, the young Navy lieutenant was standing in the East Room of the White House, summoned by the President of the United States to receive the nation's highest award for valor-the Medal of Honor. He shifted uneasily, trying to relieve the pain from his new, ill-fitting wooden leg. Earlier that morning, while dressing in his tan uniform for the last time, his surgically-shaped stump, which still bled almost daily, was so swollen he could barely fit it into his prosthesis. His face was dotted with beads of sweat and inside he was a tangle of emotions. There was a bit of pride and some joy-the occasion warranted at least that. But mostly what Joseph Robert Kerrey felt was guilt and grief. The military band struck up Hail to the Chief and the honor guard stood at attention when President Richard Nixon It was Nixon's war that had taken half of [Kerrey's] leg...arrived to begin the ceremony. Kerrey watched his commander-in-chief work his way towards him, smiling and shaking hands with some of the bravest veterans of Vietnam--if not all of American history. Soon it would be his turn to embrace the one man he "hated most on earth." Kerrey had contemplated using his White House visit to take a dramatic public stand against the war. He told confidants that he "didn't want the damn medal" and was not even certain he would shake the president's hand. Kerrey blamed Nixon for his anguish. It was Nixon's war that made him do the unthinkable. It was Nixon's war that had taken half of his leg and left him haunted by nightmares. His defiance would be seen as a shameful act of insubordination, but Kerrey was angry, confused and still emotionally and physically fragile from his wounds. He felt he had every right to speak out. But before he challenged his president in front of the world, his father, James Kerrey, imparted some old-fashioned advice to his son: "Don't do something dumb that you're going to regret all of your life." The president took great pride in honoring Medal of Honor recipients. He was known to tear up at these ceremonies, his usually stolid demeanor overcome by patriotic sentiment. These were men-at-arms, warriors willing to make the ultimate sacrifice for their country. Faithful, honorable men who had gone above and well beyond the call of duty. Each had given something of himself—either in body or spirit-that was irreplaceable, and for a cause that by 1970 millions of Americans, like Bob Kerrey, had turned against. |